31.07.06 :: july is ovah .. august is all about showing us your best side

ugh! the weekend is ovah! and july is ovah! was it not, like, one of the longest, hottest months, or what? i don't know about you, but i flipped all my calendars at home to august already. i'm a day premature (that's what she said), but i just want to get it over with. [plus, i kind of like what i'll be staring at each day in august. ruff!]

anywho, i've got to figure out somewhere to go in august for a short, extended-weekend vacation. i was thinking of going somewhere on the west coast of florida. from houston, it would be such a short [read: cheap] flight. like where would i go in florida, though? i want it to be someplace beachy, but not too sandy. somewhere gay, but not that gay. somewhere there are people, but not too touristy. somwhere good for shopping, but not too commercialized. somewhere there might be a starbucks, but not a walmart. do you know of such a place? is there such a place?

i have a friend who will be leaving for a 10-day vaca to p-town this week. i had the opportunity to go, but backed out because of the expense. that's such an a-list queen thing to do, anyway. and -- try as i may -- i'm nowhere near a-list queen material. you know about whom i'm referring? that social set -- usually paired off -- that drives matching mercedes and lives in the "right" home, and attends all the "right" functions like benefit banquets for the human rights campaign, and they have local celebrities on their christmas (or, more often, chanukah) card lists.

i have another friend who is single and an a-list queen. he's a hairdresser and makes $1,000/day sometimes and the other night he slept with twins (identical) for the second or third time. i call him, and he says, "the twins just left. can i just tell you how much i felt like the creamy center of an oreo cookie last night?"

anyway, i might not be an a-list queen, but i sure wish i had me some oreos sometime. i'm just puttin' that out there.

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 31.07.06 6:13 AM

i just wanted to give a quick shout-out (and welcome) to those of you who happened upon lonestarsteve.com for the first time yesterday and today. there was a noticible spike in page hits on those days, and it would seem that internet searches are pulling up my blog for things like "tara conner" and "evening gown" and "kayne gillespie" and "michael keith." just shows to go you that there are more project runway freaks out there than you would ever care to imagine. it's all good. i could definately use the attention, drama queen that i am.

that said, has anyone taken notice that july is nearly over and that august is upon us? long. hot. humid. august. here in houston, august marks such things as dressing down [read: naked] for even the shortest of errands, such as to buy pints of ben and jerry's at the grocery store or to score a grande iced coffee at starbucks. it also marks the month when bayou city residents actually consider taking out that second mortgage on their river oaks homes to assist in the payment of their $2,000 electric bill. yikes! all i got to say is: if air conditioning didn't exist, houston would be one dead-ass town. for sure.

this weekend, i'm thinking of taking in m. night shyamalan's lady in the water. anyone see it yet? worth the $15? let me know.

posted by lonestarsteve on fri 28.07.06 1:58 PM

i've been doing some digging on the internet into what the promos for the upcoming episode of project runway have been alluding to: the expulsion in next week's episode of a contestant from the series. i found some of the most compelling speculations here.

it would seem that season 3 contestant keith michael allegedly may have cheated his way onto the show -- and into our hearts -- by blatently copying others' designs and passing them off as his own in his portfolio (see photo above. photo credit: defamer.com).

a post about this topic on defamer.com explains that a tip on television without pity accusing michael of having stolen several designs in his audition portfolio led commenters of online bulletin board the fashion spot to do some investigating. defamer.com said, "amazingly, what emerged was that the thieving designer was also a lazy one: michael's sketches are almost exact copies of the original runway photos lifted off fashion sites such as style.com and elle.com."

defamer.com continues, "even more unbelievably, a commenter points out that in the case of the giambattista valli ripoff [pictured above], runway judge nina garcia appears to be sitting in the front row."

what gets me most about this is quite simply this: why would keith michael have to resort to something like this? he's already proven his amazing talent by having won the first challenge of the show's third season and then coming very close to winning last night's challenge (if it wasn't for his defiance to make an outfit for a dog -- so beneath him!).

tune into bravo next week for the resolution to this scandal. i know i will.

speaking of last night's episode of project runway ... episode 3, entitled "designer's best friend," was truly revealing. the challenge: to design an outfit inspired by fashion’s hottest accessory -- the tiny dog (ala paris hilton and nicole ritchie). the designers were asked to choose a small dog -- which were delivered on 13 separate leashes by none other than pr mentor tim gunn -- and use the canine as inspiration for a womenswear design for their model. they also were to create a corresponding design for their dog. they also were told to create a narrative about the woman they were designing for: what does she do? where is she going with her dog?

in his blog, gunn said of this particular challenge, "i feel compelled to mention that for me, this challenge was a turning point in the work of the 13 remaining designers. never before in any season of the show have I seen such ambitious work created. not only do we have sleeves, but they’re on coats and jackets! bravo, designers!"

uli won the challenge with the design at above right: a colorful halter dress with an asymmetrical hem. gunn writes, "the skirt had flounce and flourish and the scoop of the halter was sexy without being vulgar." uli covered her dress with a café au lait cropped jacket. the dog, einstein, donned a giraffe print coat with trim that spelled "hi ladies," a message to the judges. just precious!

gunn wrote that uli is a master with using prints. he said, "the only other designer i know who can compete with her is the incomparable diane von furstenberg." quite a compliment! keep up the great work, uli.

on the other side of the fence, katherine was auf'd for the look pictured at right. her outfit was deemed by most to be well-constructed but way, way too simple. if only the model was wearing something akin to what dog tallulah was wearing: a little green hoodie. gunn noted in his blog that he had suggested to katherine to design a similar hoodie for her model, but she didn't. gunn writes, "katherine has great potential, but as the youngest and least experienced of the designers, she just didn’t have the depth of experience to remain in the competition."

a shocker for the challenge was angela's creation (at left). gunn notes that this was the first real opportunity to see who angela was as a solo designer without constraints like materials (episode 1) and a bossy partner (episode 2). gunn writes, "she has a point of view. there’s no question about that. and i suppose that it’s best described by looking at angela: she is her own muse." her design was "a silk taffeta bubble-skirt in an oily lavender embellished with a bounty of florets and a shrunken vest in olive." angela's back-story for her model was that she was a british woman who works at a children’s art camp in paris, and that she was hosting a birthday party for pattycake, the dog.

whatever. it still doesn't explain the fact that this art camp worker looks like a common streetwalker. honestly, angela. give the florets a rest.

lastly, bradley really pulled one out of his ass -- and on his birthday of all days. using aubergine wool and honey-gold silk he created -- at nearly the last minute -- an a-line skirt with the wool and a voluminous sleeveless top with the silk. gunn writes, "the top was a construction disaster. it looked as though he had sewn it with his feet. and the fraying at every seam and hem was horrifying."

shockingly, judges loved it. nina garcia even went so far as to say that it looked like something that could be photographed for elle magazine. what? the viewing audience that i watched the show with last night were beside themselves with disbelief after that comment. "oh ... my ... god!" was exclaimed by all.

so, i've made a decision to quit my day job -- i never make it to work on time anyway -- and become a designer. turns out, all you need is some fabric and a fire under your ass and, voila! -- a fabulous dress!

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 27.07.06 8:29 AM

i caught the very, very end of the miss universe pageant last night, just in enough time to see miss u.s.a. tara conner accept the fourth runner-up nod (that's 5th place for those of you not up on pageant-speak) while wearing the evening gown that kayne gillespie and robert best teamed up to create in last week's project runway miss u.s.a. challenge.

even though the dress didn't even resemble malan's ghastly creation, ms. conner still ended up looking kinda like a brown log -- albeit a bright, iridescent one -- up on stage with the rest of the contestants. as you remember, kayne had gone against tara's request for earth-toned fabrics by selecting "a purplish effervescent organza."

anyway, miss puerto rico ended up taking the crown. and i don't think it had anything to do with the eveningwear competition. miss puerto is a hottie in her own right.

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in other news, is it monday again already? sheesh, what is it about weekends? in usual lonestarsteve style, i didn't get anything accomplished. but i'm not too concerned, that's what next weekend is for anyway.

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 24.07.06 8:00 AM

my neighbors that live in the apartment above me -- a young, very sweet married couple -- gave these photos to me to post on my blog. there were at least 20 photos taken in this mini-photo shoot as i remember, but she only turned over four to me. wonder why? anyway, here are two of them.

these photos were taken last weekend by her handsome husband in their wonderful apartment. they cooked me dinner and took me out to see an "interesting" film. when they moved in, she told me that in the last place she'd lived, she never got to know any of her neighbors until about a week before moving out, and that they turned out to be cool and worth knowing. she really regretted that. she told me that she didn't want to make that same mistake this time around. and i'm glad.

i like that i'm getting to know them both better, and i would want them to know that i hear everything that goes on in their apartment from down here. everything. [not really, but i know that they might read this and i wanted to throw that little scare their way. hee hee. besides, they may hear everything that goes on down here. now wouldn't that be a kick in the rubber parts.]

so, thanks to them both for such a wonderful evening. the next dinner will be in my place and we'll have to go to some other movie. something a little more light-hearted and fun, like eraserhead or clockwork orange or something. sheesh!

posted by lonestarsteve on sat 22.07.06 9:14 AM

last night's episode of project runway was excellent. if it proved anything it was that the judges are going to be faced with some tough decisions this season. everyone is just so talented. last night's challenge -- designing and creating an evening gown for miss u.s.a. tara conner of tennessee -- had the designers paired off into 7 teams of 2. tara served as one of the judges and would pick the winning look (she would, after all, be wearing the winning gown in the eveningwear competition at the miss universe pageant, which takes place in los angeles this sunday).

kayne, teamed with robert, won last night's competition and immunity for episode 3. tim gunn, in his blog, said that their pairing "relieved" him. he was initially concerned that kayne would potentially be "too kayne." like robert said at one point last night: "she's a pageant contestant, not a disco ball!" gunn wrote: "and i applaud kayne for the confidence he had in his vision, as demonstrated at mood. he consciously went against tara's request for earth-toned fabrics by selecting a purplish effervescent organza. i believe that he said something like: 'trust me. i know what i'm doing. tara will love it.'"

malan was auf'd last night and, as badly as you felt for the guy, rightfully so. partnered with katherine, his vision was to create what gunn called a "hulking stump of light-absorbing brown fabric." and that it was. it looked just like a tree stump, with mismatched breast cups and too short of a hem. way too short. gunn wrote: "tara had liked the corsetry of the design, but how would she respond to this iron lung of a dress, and a too-short iron lung at that?"

gunn added that malan's exit from the show should serve as proof that designers are not kept on just because of their personalities (which would translate into higher viewership).

perhaps so, but i would have so voted off vincent for his jolly-green-giant too-simple-to-be-worn gown. talk about student work!

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 20.07.06 1:57 PM

first thing's first. i would like to give a shout out to the advocate for running such a hot (dare i say, "white hot") photo on its august 15 issue's cover. can i just say, yum? the photo was taken by gay san francisco-based photographer duane cramer. it is part of his touring exhibit, "elegant." cramer has shot photos of famous peeps from model and actress brooke sheilds to san francisco mayor gavin newsom, but he is probably best known for his seductive nudes. check out his body of work here.

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per usual lonestarsteve style, i'm running late for work this morning (again) and not even wanting to go in today (again). but i did learn on monday that managers actually will be conducting performance evaluations again this year (2 years in a row, now! woo hoo!). i say this because in the 8 years that i've worked for this company, there was a period of about 3 years when we had no such thing as a performance evaluation. no raises, no bonuses, no new-hires, no promotions. it was a very dark period in my time with the company.

but last year we had evaluations, and i guess that the board decided to keep the tradition alive again this year. could this actually be the start of a trend? we'll have to see about that. i'm not holding my breath by any means. but i'm happy that they decided to conduct reviews again this year.

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in other news, episode 2 of project runway's season 3 will air tonight on bravo t.v. i know from seeing previews that the design gang will be presented with the challenge of designing an outfit for someone representing "american royalty," whatever that is. does it mean someone from the white house? is it george bush? laura bush? the bush twins? or is it someone like oprah? or the first lady of california maria shriver? or is it madonna? tune in and find out. contestants tonight will be paired off in 7 groups of 2. maybe it will be a double-elimination round. also, remember that keith michael, winner of last week's challenge, has immunity this week, so he cannot be auf'd by ms. klum.

it's hump day. make it count, mein liebchens.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 19.07.06 7:38 AM

i fancy myself a relatively ed-u-ma-ca-ted individual, but i've just got to say that i saw a movie over the weekend that sent my brain into a tailspin. it was one of those movies -- art films, actually -- that no matter how closely you watched -- concentrating hard on any subversive meaning or symbolism -- you still ended up walking out of the theater muttering to yourself, "what the fuck?"

such a movie was matthew barney's drawing restraint 9. barney, of course, is husband to avant-guard icelandic songstress björk. both she and barney played the main characters ("the guests") in the film.

film critic ryan stewart with cinematical.com perhaps summed up one of the most disturbing scenes of the movie as such:

"what occurs next is wrenching, and it’s the one time in the film when barney takes advantage of the camera’s ability to not only report and observe, but also to trick the eye. this is the film’s visual centerpiece, where some real, if gruesome filmic panache is demonstrated. the guests begin to cut away each others’ lower limbs with flensing knives, at first shearing away feet and then digging into thighs, hips and legs. the water/oil slosh fills not with blood, but waxy gore as the guests’ upper halves bob upright and uninjured. eventually their lower halves are sculpted completely away, revealing the beginnings of whalish vertebrae, which they use to swim away to safety."

ryan poses these questions:

"did the infusion of whale oil act as a kind of amniotic fluid that re-birthed the guests? did their strict attention to shinto grooming and dressing rituals earlier in the film see them rewarded with some kind of metamorphosis, transforming them from body-souls into object-souls? has an imbalance of energy been restored by the washing away of the humans in favor of a liquid-friendly form?

all i have to say is this: call me when the space shuttle lands.

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 17.07.06 2:14 PM

tons going on this weekend: shopping, volleyball, parties, dinners, gameshows, meetings, etc. it's going to be one of those weekends that i'll need a weekend to recover from.

got to see strangers with candy, the movie last night. saw it alone. don't feel badly for me though. it was good to see it alone. really.

it was funny (well-written) but not as good as i had anticipated. i could see why it got panned in some reviews. of course, i've only ever seen a handful of s.w.c. episodes on t.v., so how should i know how funny it could have been. stephen colbert is such a trip. his humor is so sharp, and he interacts well with amy sedaris. good flick, though. i recommend it if you haven't seen it. but bring someone you love to see it with you; it might be funnier that way. or more sad. i guess we'll never know...

i need to get over to the galleria at some point this weekend to shop for some clothes. it's been quite a while since i've had a spree (read: retail therapy) and i'm about to bust at the seams. jeans and belts, that's what i'm looking for. and shoes. and shirts. and maybe some underwear. and socks. but that's all.

may you have one of the best weekends on record. i know i'm going to try to.

much more later, my chillins.

posted by lonestarsteve on sat 15.07.06 10:47 AM

men suck sometimes.

had a tentative "date" set up for last night. ask me what happened. go ahead. can't you guess? ok, so i didn't even know the guy from adam, and i'm not completely writing him off, but just answer me this: what happens to one's fingers when one can't (or doesn't want to) show up in person for a date that one can't use said fingers to dial 10 digits on their little cell phones to let others know they are no longer available at the appointed time? to tell you that they are now pinned beneath a truck that has struck their car on the highway and await ambulatory assistance to rush them to get their arm sewn back on? or to say that while doing laundry some absent-minded bleach was splashed up into their eyes rendering them legally blind and therefore unable to drive to the predetermined meeting location? is it truly too much to ask? am i asking too much? apparently so.

when things like this happen to me, they are disheartening, yes. but unbearably so, no. i just start to lose my faith in people a little when disappointed in such a way. not a lot, but just a little. it's just one more layer that gets sloughed off the onion, you know? that thin piece of skin that was probably going to fall off anyway. i expect too much, i guess. i also expect others to act as i would, and that will always leave one disappointed. always. that's no way to live: with high expectations. others will do as they do, and you have to grin and bear it.

or bend over and take it. chose your mixed metaphor.

posted by lonestarsteve on fri 14.07.06 9:06 AM

a few friends came over last night to watch episode 1 of project runway's third season. (thank-you, david v., for the pic).

the first episode did not disappoint. the 15 designers chosen for this season are a) very talented, b) very opinionated, and c) very competitive. i'm looking forward to seeing what happens every wednesday.

i have my favorites of the contestants already. going on pure physicality rather than talent, i wouldn't turn down a robert best-lonestarsteve-keith michael sandwich. can i just say 'yum?' but like i was saying, the whole group -- both men and women -- are talented. in fact, keith won last night's challenge, gaining immunity for the next challenge. [side note :: what's up with handing out the immunities so early in the season? last season, i think they had one immunity challenge.]

more later on my impressions of the show. there is lots and lots of p.r. information and fan/viewer feedback at this stie. enjoy.

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 13.07.06 2:10 PM

12.07.06 :: keepin' the boulder in front of my love cave ...

when will strangers with candy, the movie be showing in this godforsaken city? it premiered in new york at the end of june, but every time i check its release dates, it tells me that the movie not been released in the bayou city. if anyone has any details, i would be most grateful.

i did find two versions of trailers for the movie itself. it looks like it's going to be hilarious. amy sedaris is simply brilliant.

one exchange that sedaris and stephen colbert have in the movie:

as she walks away, jerri mumbles something about the principal.
colbert (as principal): what did you say?
sedaris (as jerri): what did you hear?
principal: i'd rather not repeat it.
jerri: well then i guess we'll never know.

the principal falls in love with a male teacher. this is one of their exchanges:
principal: i need more out of this relationship than i'm willing to put in.
teacher: you're pushing me away.
principal: i wasn't pushing you away. i was pulling me toward myself.

more details about the movie are available here.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 12.07.06 7:37 AM

season 3 of bravo t.v.'s project runway starts this wednesday, july 12. i'm having a premier party. want to come? starts at 9 eastern, 8 central. don't be late, and bring a friend.

you can learn more about this season's 15 designers (why only 15 this season? i wonder...) by clicking on their mugs below. (all photos courtesy of bravo t.v. -- and they didn't make it too easy to download the photos. those little fuckers).

[note :: even if you have no intention of watching this season's shows, please at least admire the photos; i don't do tables in dreamweaver (read :: can't do tables, and refuse to learn) and this layout took a fucking long time to do. that's how dedicated i am to making life easy for you, gentle reader. now there's a huge chunk of my life that i'll never see again. *sigh*]

bradley baumkirchner, 32, los angeles, calif.	robert best, 36, west hollywood, calif.	laura bennett, 42, new york, n.y.
malan breton, 32, long island city, n.y.	bonnie dominguez, 31, san diego, calif.	stacey estrella, 40, san francisco, calif.
katherine gerdes, 25, minneapolis, minn.	kayne gillaspie, 27, norman, okla.	uli herzner, 35, miami beach, fla.
alison kelly, 25, brooklyn, n.y.	angela keslar, 33, amesville, ohio	michael knight, 28, atlanta, ga.
vincent libretti, 49, santa monica, calif.	keith michael, 34, new york, n.y.	jeffrey sebelia, 36, los angeles, calif.

posted by lonestarsteve on sat 08.07.06 11:30 AM

i know you missed me. don't deny it. i just had to take a break there for a while. recollect my thoughts. decompress. rest.

i went to see the devil wears prada last night. although i thought anne hathaway's andy sachs fell flat, meryl streep was brilliant as runway magazine's executive editor miranda priestly. i swear that woman can make me laugh with just a look. an eye roll. a pursing of the lips. she's such an amazing actress.

the movie is based on the 2003 bestseller by lauren weisberger by the same name. weisberger's fiction is based on her experience at vogue with editor anna wintour, although she would be the first to deny the book is a "poison pen" letter to her former boss.

either way, it's a must-see. seeing it will change your life. trust.

in other news, just in case you all missed leonid the magnificent on nbc's newest "let's-parade-a-bunch-of-freaks-in-front-of-millions-of-viewers-just-for-shits-and-giggles" reality blockbuster, america's got talent, hosted by none other than regis philbin, i thought i would profile one of the acts here. i'm doing this because i know that your lives would be a complete and utter loss if you lacked this information.

leonid -- a 6-ft, 9-in. native russian -- performed his act wearing women's silver knee-high platform boots, a mini white skirt, angel's wings, and tons of make up and hair product. he balanced a sword on the tip of another sword that he held in his teeth while doing a split. utter genious. and he's moved on to the next round.

needless to say, i won't be watching the show anymore. it airs on my sock-matching night. pity. it would have been such a show-stopper.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 05.07.06 1:48 PM