22.03.05 :: it never was the cars and guitars that came between us

a friend sent me this. it's hysterical. and hopefully it will come true. four years can't go by soon enough for me. i feel so bush-whacked lately.

in other news, the workout sessions at the gym have been going well. i feel better already, and it's only been a week. it's amazing what your mind can get your body to do if you're only willing. i've been eating well also. a lot of tuna. then a friend told me not to eat too much tuna for fear that i would develop mercury poisoning. honestly, is there anything that we can eat and feel safe in doing so?

otherwise, just making it through my 4-day work week. friday (good friday) is a holiday for my work. good thing. these 5-day work weeks are taking their toll on me. i definitely can use the down time.

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 22.03.05 7:17 AM

you know, i used to have a pretty decent body. not anything to cream over, but good enough to get a few glances every now and again. i always forget that fact.

after getting sober, sure i denied myself alcohol and drugs, but allowed myself to partake in practically anything else that would make me happy: cookies, cake, ice cream (lots of ice cream). and on top of it, i stopped working out altogether. why should i work out? it hurts. it's difficult. it takes too much time.

well, 2 years is just about enough time where those habits will really start to get you down -- literally. i'm here to say that the ice cream will eventually bring you down. to your knees.

so, that said, on monday i began getting healthier. i'm still smoking, unfortunately, but i started back up at the gym (thank you, brad, for the membership) and i already feel better. in future months, expect to see photos in this space of more than just my head. i'm really hoping to stick with this.

it's got to happen. for sanity's sake.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 16.03.05 7:33 AM

[note to self: people will stop visiting your blog site if you stop posting new entries. try to avoid this problem by blogging more often, at least every other day, if not more.]

don't mind me, i've just been going through what i can only term "a rough patch." i think i'm better now for the moment.

in other news, i feel so safe in my apartment with my always-alert, highly-trained guard cat, badger, on door detail. as you can see from the photo, she is fearlessly fighting to get miss possum from eating the food left for the other courtyard cats. you go, badger! you get 'em, girl!

good weekend so far (and it's not even over with yet). did a lot of cleaning, scrubbing, washing, drying, folding, dusting, preening, grooming. and then i decided to clean my apartment as well.

hung out with the dust-man last night, along with some other friends. we had rented movies to watch, but ended up doing the usual: talking about men, relationships, sex, and lack thereof. right now, dustie's got a serious case of "sex-on-the-brain" -- every 12 seconds, to be exact. you go, dustie!

actually, what i came away with from last night's gathering (and by the way, thanks steven for cooking dinner -- simply delish!) was this: dustie and my other friends are such good people. they are good men. they are good relationship material. so, why is it then that we spend so much time searching for our mate? is it that we live in houston? is it because we're sober? is it because we try too hard overanalyze things? probably a combination of all of the above.

like dustie, i'm going to stop giving out the milk for free. even as horny as i might get, i'm going to wait for that special someone to come along -- that one guy who really butters my biscuit -- and we will date first, and get to know one another really well, before taking the big plunge.

what am i saying? i'm not really going to do that, but you can't blame a girl for trying...

posted by lonestarsteve on sun 13.03.05 11:35 AM

i got my ticket to see miss amos (tori) in april in dallas. her concert schedule didn't allow for houston for some reason even though we're the better city (bite me, you dallasites). but, i'm psyched nevertheless (can't you tell by the expression on my face?) her tour, i'm told, has already sold out in nearly every city. you go, tori!

anywho, i'm risking being very, very late for work (and by that i mean, much later than the usual hour that i'm late everyday), so i must be brief.

i've been wondering lately if i'm destined for singlehood for the rest of my long, gay life. and i'm coming to terms with that. whenever i have been single in the past, it has never been for too long. i just do the couple thing all too well. i find comfort in it -- in building the trust, the love, and the companionship. also, whenever i've found myself alone, i just don't flourish as well as i do when i'm with someone. so be it.

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 03.03.05 7:48 AM